NAKED GREEN MACHINE

I know what you’re thinking:

What the hell?  Is that a picture of some VEGETABLES?  Get those off my screen!!

I love me some smoothies.   Anybody can make Strawberry/Banana taste good.   But seeing kryptonite  vegetables on the label I wonder how good could it be?   I mean I have tried the Odwalla Superfood and was surprised.

Odwalla was good, but NAKED takes the prize on the green smoothies.    It just has a more robust and rich set of flavor mixing in each taste.   I can’t even taste broccoli.  That alone is worth gold.

Sam’s Choice Pizza

I have always been, for the most part, a name-brand person.  FRUIT LOOPS was AWESOME…and “FRUIT HOOPIES” (the crappy-store-bought-brand-on-the-bottom-shelf-that-didn’t-even-come-in-a-box-just-a-clear-baggie) always SUCKED.  I know cuz my neighbor’s parents would buy the knock-off for the kids to eat while they ate the name-brand stuff.

But times, they are a changing, and after visiting some factories and distributors I am discovering a couple of nice little secrets.

ONE:   Some name-brand items and knock-items could be the exact same thing these days.   Some are made at the same plant, and slight alteration in formula can result in two items that are basically identical.

TWO:  People’s taste are as finicky as ever.    Cheap ingredients will not sell like the old days.   So these smaller named companies are stepping up their game.

SAM’S CHOICE is one of the “in-house” brands sold at WalMart.     Honestly the picture just looked good.   I also noticed that the pizza is right next to the other premium rising-crust pizzas — and was 2 dollars cheaper.

“How can you screw up a pepperoni pizza?”  I thought, and bought it.

I have to give Sam’s a TON of credit up front on this pie.   I mean look at it.  It’s a fine lookin’ pizza.   It has some char on the crust…and even some slightly burnt edges on the pepperonis.  This looks fresh from a pizzeria!      I checked on it half-way an noticed the pizza had a great rise to the dough while cooking.  It actually puffed-up higher than any other “rising-crust” I have tried.

The pepperoni was tender and crispy-burnt as I said.  Perfect.   The cheese and sauce were also better in quality than I was expecting.   The only drawback was the crust.  It did rise, but it had a slightly dry and bland taste to it.   That small personal detail aside, it was a worth the 3 bucks or so that I paid for it.    If you had kids (and wanted to follow in my old neighbor’s footsteps) or had a big sports party, buying a dozen of these and cranking them out for a hungry crowd would be cheap and easy out.   Probably get some compliments too!

DUNKIN’ DONUTS Glazed Breakfast Sammich

I often have twitter-wars, email arguments, and food review dinners with several official JFC tasters and friends.    I have always had an open door policy for their input, and I got this in the mail the other day.    A JFC contributor, D.C. Diner,  beat me to the punch on trying the new Dunkin’ breakfast sammiches.     Don’t be fooled by the glam pic.  That is what it’s supposed to look like …and gives you an idea to go along with the actual review.    Here is D.C. Diner with a taste-taste-review:

 

A donut is a terrible thing to waste. And that’s what Dunkin’s latest breakfast sandwich is – a waste of a good donut. While other reviewers have said it tastes like a pancake, bacon and egg breakfast, I think it’s just too sweet and soggy, without the maple syrup taste of an actual pancake breakfast. The glazed donut loses a lot when it’s warmed and sliced in half. The texture is kind of gummy and it’s too sticky to hold. The bacon and egg inside, though, are very good. Crisp bacon — not too smoky — and plenty of it, and a perfectly round hard fried egg. I took one bite and ended up just eating the bacon and egg. If you’re craving savory and sweet for breakfast, McDonald’s McGriddles are a tastier choice. —  D.C. Diner.

 

DORITOS Original

I love this guy.  He’s a total underdog.  I don’t see him as often as I would like in my neighborhood grocery stores.

He’s lightly salted, toasted, and inspired a generation (or 10).    If you want a great snacking chip you really should think about trying these babies.

I know his sister chip, NACHO CHEESE, gets a ton of attention and purchases.   Even little brother COOL RANCH gets more love than this older brother.

But when you taste the utter simplicity of these, you will understand why they are still around.  Even all these years later he still is the perfect partner for your dips and salsas.

Great chip.  A classic.  Earned every ounce of his reputation.

TRADER JOE’s Joe-Joe’s

Trader Joe’s has their own version of the classic OREO cookie.   They call them “Joe-Joe’s” and it’s just the WRONG name for this product.

A better name would have been OREO KILLER.    I am not even sure how or what happened but these are seriously good.   Like-I-might-not-ever-buy-another-oreo-good.   Maybe it’s the chocolate filling that threw me but I have had chocolate Oreos before and they weren’t this addictive.

This box didn’t last 24 hours among the JFC crumb crunching crew.  These are a MUST-BUY and go on that weekly TJ list of yours.

You will thank me.

ROCKIN’ B SALSA

A little while back, I told you about TOMMY TAMALE .  Click here for that review.  Fantastic find in Grapevine that sells tamales and other local or hometown type products.  In the taste test we did at the JFC compound everyone kept asking what salsa I was serving with those fantastic tamales.

Wonder no more because this is ROCKIN’ B SALSA.   It’s brought to you by the same fine folks that made the tamales.   Yep…Tommy Tamale has their own signature-salsa-brand and it’s KILLER.

Whenever I try a new product, I always look for the off-beat choice first.   Tons of people make your basic red salsa.   But when people get creative, I get amped.

So out of the line of Rockin’ B salsas, the ROASTED GREEN HOT SALSA stood out.   It’s not-red-not-green-almost-kinda-yellowish appearance might throw you off since it’s not “GREEN” like the label says.

HOWEVER, the “green” refers to the roasted tomatoes they use —green…duh… to make this YUM-YUM salsa.   The package details a simple handful of ingredients so you know this is super-fresh and not filled with all kinds of preservatives and chemicals I can’t understand or pronounce.

It’s just a very simple and tasty sauce that has some sneaky-heat to it.   It creeps up on you fast and you will find yourself not caring because you want just one more chip dipped in it.

I believe currently it’s only available at Tommy Tamale in Grapevine.  So you will have to make a trip there to get it…but if you paid attention to the tamale review…you should be on your way to their store now anyway so just add this to your list.

Easily one of the best salsas I have had this year.   No doubt.

KOOL-AID Water Enhancer

Okay folks is going kray-kray over these “water enhancer” things.  It seems like every company is racing to get one out.

When you was a kid, or me last Saturday afternoon, nothing was better on a hot summer day than guzzling down some kick-ass Kool-Aid.  To this day, Kool-Aid reminds me of good times…and my best friend laughing so hard he snarf’ed  it through his nose by accident.   Like I said.  Good times.

So when I see the miniature Kool-Aid man on the shelf as a ‘water enhancer”

wow…can someone come up with a better term?  I mean can this sound any less fun and any more corporate?

Anyway Kool-Aid is here to the rescue.  So I snatched up the most likely of winners – GRAPE. I mean how can you mess up grape?  It’s everywhere it’s strong and full of flavor.

I like the idea of these products.   You buy a 16 oz bottle of water and mix in the flavor to your desired satisfaction.    Sounds all JETSON-y, huh?

Well at the store I was thinking…..portable Kool-Aid???  OH YEAH!!!! and I was ready for him to come …him being Kool-Aid Man….to come busting through the aisle to congratulate me on discovering this product.

Back at the crib, I made up a batch per exact directions and squirtage.

Oh boy.

It was an instant “hey…grape!….followed by …what is this …cough syrup?”    Maybe my taste-buds are wonky or something.  It just tasted like synthetic-sweet-cough-syrup.

OH YEAH>>…. quickly turned into….oh no.

Now I gotta figure a way to get this aftertaste out of my mouth.  I have matchbooks around here somewhere.